Dear Secret Blogiary,
Mister W. and I don’t drink all that much. Mister W enjoys a beer every now and then. I’ll drink a cocktail occasionally. So we don’t often have a decent supply of alcohol in the house for when we actually do want to drink a little bit more than Crystal Light or milk.
Today after Mister W. got home, we felt like “getting sloshed.” (Trust me, I am such a light weight nine times out of ten I can’t even finish one drink let alone get sloshed!)
Mister W. and I wanted Mudslides, so I took Big Sis with me on a liquor run for company. Somehow, (seriously, it was like one second I was looking for Irish cream and the next I had 7 bottles in my arms) I also ended up with the fixings for Grasshoppers (my favorite!) and a bottle of Amarula (so yummy). I ended up buying far more liquor than I actually needed. Instead of a bag, the cashier gave me a box. Classy.
Big Sis: You are putting that in the trunk, right?
Me: (carrying a box of liquor) That’s why I gave you the keys.
Big Sis: And you aren’t planning on drinking until you get home, right?
Me: That’s the plan. Why?
Big Sis: Just checking.
Me: I haven’t yet progressed to the “lush” stage of my life, Kiddo. You know that, right?
Big Sis: Yeah. (pause to open the trunk) Mom? Where are you going to put all of these bottles?
Me: In the liquor cabinet.
Big Sis: We don’t have a – OH! You mean on top of the fridge?
Me: Yup. The liquor cabinet. Although when I hit the lotto I am totally going to have a real one.
Big Sis: You could buy a mansion and have a whole room for your liquor.
Me: That would be a lot of alcohol. I don’t think-
Big Sis: It could be your “liqourary!”
Me: Huh?
Big Sis: You know! Like a “library” but for your liquor. A Liqourary.
Me: Huh.
Big Sis: What? You don’t like it?
Me: Actually, I think it is brilliant! And then we could alphabetize all the bottles-
Big Sis: And color coordinate them!
Me: You are seriously awesome.
Mister W. and I managed our one (how old we are getting) Mudslide each. He went to bed and I must confess, after only half the glass, I too am ready for bed.
So for the record:
1. I now have enough liquor to last me until at least Christmas and
2. My goal of “getting sloshed” to have wild drunk sex (God where have those days gone?) has epically failed.
Countdowns
Showing posts with label having fun with the girls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label having fun with the girls. Show all posts
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Lack of Maturity
Dear Secret Blogiary,
Big Sis hung out “free range” style at the mall today. The first time ever. What did she return home with? Forbidden skinny jeans? Inappropriate novelties from Spencer’s?
Nope.
A new Build-A-Bear.
Me: You blew your money on a Build-A-Bear?
Big Sis: Yeah. And?
Me: Nothing. (shaking my head and smirking) Put it in the trunk.
Big Sis: (Puts box in trunk and takes out the new Bear and climbs into the front seat)
Me: Really? You are so immature.
Big Sis: Says the girl who slobbered on my arm and claimed she was a lamprey the other day.
Me: I…But…
Big Sis: And who went around saying “balls” over and over with different adjectives in front of it last week.
Me: …
Big Sis: I win!
Fine. She "wins." But only because I was being nice.
Big Sis hung out “free range” style at the mall today. The first time ever. What did she return home with? Forbidden skinny jeans? Inappropriate novelties from Spencer’s?
Nope.
A new Build-A-Bear.
Me: You blew your money on a Build-A-Bear?
Big Sis: Yeah. And?
Me: Nothing. (shaking my head and smirking) Put it in the trunk.
Big Sis: (Puts box in trunk and takes out the new Bear and climbs into the front seat)
Me: Really? You are so immature.
Big Sis: Says the girl who slobbered on my arm and claimed she was a lamprey the other day.
Me: I…But…
Big Sis: And who went around saying “balls” over and over with different adjectives in front of it last week.
Me: …
Big Sis: I win!
Fine. She "wins." But only because I was being nice.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Playing Hookey
Dear Secret Blogiary,
After a particularly stressful Wednesday, I needed a break. So I took one. I played hooky. But even better than that, Big Sis and Little Sis came right along with me!
I am corrupting the youth! Well, my youth anyway.
I wish I could say that we lazed in our PJs until noon eating bon-bons (which just so we are clear, I have never had). But even knowing that we were skipping school, we were all up at our regular time. Pitiful. What a waste of good sleeping weather.
I wish I could say that I made pancakes or waffles, but I didn't. Cold cereal and leftover oatmeal filled our bellies.
I wish I could say that I ignored all the housework in favor of sitting at the computer and playing Sims until my blood congealed in my rear.
What we did instead: cleaned. Scrubbed, vacuumed, organized and washed the upstairs in preparation for my Father's visit. He'll be here tomorrow and we didn't finish!
Instead, after we got the rooms shiny, we went for sushi and I discovered that I totally love raw salmon. Can't stand it when its cooked, but I am digging it raw. We went to the library where, after paying my overdue fines, I checked out enough trashy romances to last me until Nano starts. Then to Target for last minute materials for an upcoming Girl Scout meeting. And a quick dash to the Halloween store where the girls finally decided on costumes.
There used to be a time when I made them from scratch, but they are both so undecided and wishy-washy that it is just more practical to let them wander around the aisles and pick something.
Big Sis is going as either Indiana Jones or a Ninja. Possibly Indiana Jones dressed as a Ninja. Either way its cool. Little Sis was going to be a Vampire Fairy. Then she was going to be a Poison Butterfly. She really wanted something with wings and something "scary." What she ended up with was a purple witch's costume decked out in rhinestones and a can of purple hair spray.
Then we spent an hour in PetSmart naming each hamster and gerbil. They have both been hinting (and by hinting please understand that to mean: begging non-stop for weeks) that they would love to have hamsters. Cute, fluffy, cuddly little hamsters that would just as soon die if you look at them funny.
The final result: I need to skip school more often! And I have apparently pledged myself to "thinking about" hamsters.
After a particularly stressful Wednesday, I needed a break. So I took one. I played hooky. But even better than that, Big Sis and Little Sis came right along with me!
I am corrupting the youth! Well, my youth anyway.
I wish I could say that we lazed in our PJs until noon eating bon-bons (which just so we are clear, I have never had). But even knowing that we were skipping school, we were all up at our regular time. Pitiful. What a waste of good sleeping weather.
I wish I could say that I made pancakes or waffles, but I didn't. Cold cereal and leftover oatmeal filled our bellies.
I wish I could say that I ignored all the housework in favor of sitting at the computer and playing Sims until my blood congealed in my rear.
What we did instead: cleaned. Scrubbed, vacuumed, organized and washed the upstairs in preparation for my Father's visit. He'll be here tomorrow and we didn't finish!
Instead, after we got the rooms shiny, we went for sushi and I discovered that I totally love raw salmon. Can't stand it when its cooked, but I am digging it raw. We went to the library where, after paying my overdue fines, I checked out enough trashy romances to last me until Nano starts. Then to Target for last minute materials for an upcoming Girl Scout meeting. And a quick dash to the Halloween store where the girls finally decided on costumes.
There used to be a time when I made them from scratch, but they are both so undecided and wishy-washy that it is just more practical to let them wander around the aisles and pick something.
Big Sis is going as either Indiana Jones or a Ninja. Possibly Indiana Jones dressed as a Ninja. Either way its cool. Little Sis was going to be a Vampire Fairy. Then she was going to be a Poison Butterfly. She really wanted something with wings and something "scary." What she ended up with was a purple witch's costume decked out in rhinestones and a can of purple hair spray.
Then we spent an hour in PetSmart naming each hamster and gerbil. They have both been hinting (and by hinting please understand that to mean: begging non-stop for weeks) that they would love to have hamsters. Cute, fluffy, cuddly little hamsters that would just as soon die if you look at them funny.
The final result: I need to skip school more often! And I have apparently pledged myself to "thinking about" hamsters.
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